It's the elephant in the room.
But I'm prepared to go there – where most people can't or won't.
Because as a qualified sexologist, I've seen firsthand how power dynamics in the bedroom reflect power dynamics in all the other parts of your life.
Including your business.
This has been an ever-present topic in private mentoring sessions this year in particular – where what does or doesn’t happen behind closed doors is having a profound ripple effect on or is being mirrored in the business.
You won’t hear this from any mainstream business mentors – or on Shark Tank – but it’s the truth:
Your business is a mirror of you.
Every unclaimed desire, every hidden fear, every unspoken truth is reflected back in how you show up, how you lead, and how others respond to you.
If you’ve ever felt like something’s holding you back – like there’s an edge you haven’t quite crossed – then the missing piece isn’t more strategy.
It’s power.
And that’s where my expertise as a sexologist comes in.
Stripping bare and getting naked in front of 5500 strangers, friends and fellow queer folk doesn’t scare me…but the risk of leaving myself exposed absolutely does.
And I see you doing just that. Unknowingly living out one of my greatest fears.
Being unwilling to strip bare is what's leaving you exposed.
That thing…
That tick, that habit, that pain, that shame, that fear, that leak, that mode, that…
Deep. Dark. Sh*t.
That you don't want anyone to know about or see or even get a whiff of...
...the more you know it, stroke it, hold it to a flame and befriend it as the valuable data it is – the less exposed you'll feel and be.
I’m a bisexual woman and sexual expert that doesn’t identify as overtly, traditionally feminine. I love my short hair and I love wearing pants. Put me in a flowy dress and I’ll feel nauseous. I’m driven to write, speak and create to the point of tired satisfaction. I’m kind and I’ll be straight to the point without the fluff. I love getting dirty, free bleeding and forgoing bras. I have daughters but don’t identify as a mother first and foremost. I think yoga and pilates is boring and repressive in its need to control your body but ask me to dance and you’ll see my aliveness and a wave of calm wash over me. I don’t get obsessions with handbags or shoes and I will never call you babe or lovely.
Does any or all of this make me more masculine or feminine?
This article is here to deconstruct what your options are beyond the binary of masculine and feminine energy.
I listen to women like you every day of the week.
Women who say they’re done with certain dynamics playing out in their business but their actions remain devotedly committed to those dynamics playing out.
The point you’re getting stuck at in business is:
the guilt…
the frustration…
the bitterness…
the shrinking…
the looking outward…
These states are holding you back. When you’re in them, it’s as if you have no power to break through.
Oh, but you do...
Will you have a Climactic year in business? or will you not? What are you setting yourself up for? Based on who you are today and what it is that you're doing? Because that's what it comes down to.
It is line in the sand time. I want you to know that right now you can decide differently. You can decide as of this moment to have a business that feels intensely pleasurable, satisfying, profitable in every definition…
Here’s how.
Is your repressed eroticism running your business? We're going to dive deep into a topic that might just be the key to unlocking the potential of your business. We'll be discussing the signs that indicate whether your repressed erotic energy is running your business and how this can make or break your entrepreneurial journey. It's crucial to recognise the role your sensual and erotic energy plays in your business decisions because it directly impacts your satisfaction, fulfilment, and success….
Choosing pleasure may sound like a simple decision, but in reality, it can be one of the most transformative and challenging choices you make in your life. It's a decision that requires you to prioritise your womanhood over your inner little girl, to embrace your power, and to break free from the constraints of people-pleasing and self-sacrifice. In this blog, we'll explore the journey of choosing your White Hot Pleasure and the profound impact it can have on your life, bedroom and business.
For as long as women are walking around, buttoned up and living and leading from self-sacrifice instead of a surplus of what feels good, we collectively aren't moving the needle for each other or the generations that are looking to us. It’s time to move the needle. Drastically. Pleasure is the antidote to martyr mode.
Stress acts as a libido blocker and so many smart women are in a tend and befriend relationship with it. They say: stress has gotten me to this point. And striving has gotten me to this point. And it's given me a certain degree of success.
And what our brains do is go: I'm here these are all the things I did to get here in order to get there, I'll just double-time those original efforts.
Mmm but Libido doesn’t respond to that. There’s another way.
Your pleasure. Your aliveness and your capacity to feel are always important. It's always of the utmost priority. Even when the circumstances out there feel in complete opposition to that. There is no way that we can continue to keep evolving and to keep doing what we do best as humans without you being in what you would consider a turned on state for yourself. We can't do it without you being your most turned on self.
I’ve just navigated one of the most triggering weeks of my life…and one of the most sublime.
Are both possible?
Definitely.
You can hold both of these dualities and more.
I can hold both of these dualities and more.
In the midst of the week where I finally started treatment for hyperthyroidism, I also received my neuro-cognitive assessment back from the psychologist - anyone who has done this knows you have to bring up the past…those big T and little t traumas that shape part of what make you and your mind - you.
But that’s not actually the triggering part…